Modest Little Men

Hunter and Warren

My husband's job requires travel. For some families that would be a hindrance, but for our family it's great to be able to take the kids to all of these new places. We love driving across the states, seeing new places, making new memories, and welcoming new experiences. Recently, we traveled to Pensacola, FL. Not only is it absolutely beautiful, but in early February when most are wearing coats and sweaters, we were in shorts and ready to swim! The boys got up early, had breakfast, did their school work, and were getting increasingly impatient with my outfit changing. When I stepped out of the bathroom, my oldest son was, well let's just say very vocal about my choice of swimsuit...

[Those of you that know me personally know that when I pack for a weekend trip- I pack! Not just a little, not just one or two bags; usually at least three bags plus makeup and shoes! (I am fully aware of the fact that this is not normal haha) And swimsuits are no exception. For this trip I packed three different ones. My favorite one is a longer tankini type with bottoms that are shorts. I also packed another tankini set that has regular bikini bottoms, and a one piece.]

...Normally, I wear my favorite swimsuit, but there was no one at the pool, and I figured I could tan a little bit more of my legs with the regular bikini bottoms. So, I came out of the restroom in my suit and the response I received was definitely not expected. I was asked what I was wearing, why was I wearing that suit, and told that he did not like that swimsuit. This barrage of questions and opinions from my son was daunting.

To be honest, initially I was offended. My "woman brain" kicked in and started telling me that I was not skinny enough to wear a regular bikini- heck, even my son was embarrassed. I changed into my other swimsuit, the fave, and we headed for the pool.

I pulled my son aside once at the pool and asked what he did not like about my first choice of swimsuit. He openly and honestly spoke, "I think it shows too much skin, Mom." I was taken aback.

Since the kids have started getting older, I always try to be mindful of our outfit choices, especially mine and our daughter's. Her and I have had plenty of talks about being appropriate in attire. It really got me to thinking. Do I talk to my little men about modesty enough? Our daughter is the oldest of the kids, so naturally, she has been privy to more of these talks. Do other families talk to their sons about modesty? Is it even a "male" topic?

"What's good for the goose, is good for the gander." Right? I believe so. I believe we as parents have a responsibility to talk to our daughters AND our sons about modesty. I also believe that modesty is not necessarily only a clothing issue, as much as it is a heart issue. Herein lies the most important issue - how is the heart of my child?

Proverbs 23:7 KJV says, “For as he thinks in his heart, so is he.” Our goal as parents needs to be to teach them to have a pure heart. In doing so, we will teach them to be pure in spirit and attire. I love what Suzanne Eller from Reel Teen Faith says, "Having a modest heart is expecting and showing character and integrity. It’s demonstrating and expecting a gentle and faith-filled attitude. It’s balancing the cultural message of external value with the truth of the benefits of living as a godly young man." We are modest because 1 Corinthians 6:19-20 tells us to,"Your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit who is in you, whom you have from God, and that you are not your own? For you have been bought with a price: therefore glorify God in your body." 

If you have a son, how are you preparing his heart? I am learning and growing with you other mommas out there. If you have input, I'd love to hear it!

He loves us so. Be blessed my loves.